The ongoing prank wars of D GrayMan
by Hiddendemon666
Summary: Self explanatory. We start out with Lavi and Allen messing with Kanda's hair. How will Kanda get revenge? You'll find out if you read. Body switching as well, and some harsh revenge! Mostly a Kanda/Lavi messing with each other fic. Read*Review!
1. Kanda's hair

Disclaimer: I unfortunately do not own D

Disclaimer: I unfortunately do not own D. Gray-Man, because if I did, things would be a lot more like gravitation Nor do I own any of the individual character, much to my disappointment. But anyway, he we go, the first part of D. Gray-Man's on going prank wars. XD let the fun begin.

Kanda's eye gave an angry twitch as he sat at the table; drumming his fingers so hard into the table it was leaving dents.

"Kanda-chan, you lost!" A vein in the blue haired mans head was dangerously close to bursting.

"You know what that means" Lavi smirked from the other side of the room, in his one hand was a brush, and in the other were a couple of hair ties. Well, and some bobby pins. And hair spray. And other things one might need for tormenting the swordsman.

"No." Kanda growled, shoved his chair back and standing up. Lavi moved forward, shoving the things into Allen's nervous hands to walk over to Kanda, blocking the man's exit.

"You have no choice!" Lavi sang out, taking the other man by the arm. Allen looked a little more nervous, as Kanda was glaring at him. Lavi helped Kanda back into the seat, where the blue haired man promptly crossed his arms, wondering where they had hid his innocence.

"You did swear on your honor as a swordsman….." Allen through in, a smile creeping onto his face in spite of himself. Kanda's glare could have spilt a rock. To bad it could seem to get through the door. In short, Kanda had gotten caught up in a card game with Allen and Lavi. Lavi wasn't very good at cards, but Kanda was worse. He would later find out they had plotted it that way on purpose.

"This is ridicules and childish." He muttered, glaring into the wall and Lavi summoned Allen over, and started to pull the hair tie out of Kanda's hair. The man flinched and stood up, blue hair spilling in waves around his body.

"NO." He snapped, his hand out for the hair tie back. Lavi smirked while Allen backed up a little.

"You want to know where Mugan is?" Kanda blew out a frustrated sigh, slamming back into the chair, arms firmly crossed.

"Yeah!" Lavi sang out, getting the brush from Allen, and started to pull it through Kanda's hair. It wasn't hard, the man took rather good care of his hair. Kanda's fingers drummed angrily into the table top as Lavi pulled Kanda's bangs back, and continued to brush it, Allen helping to hold the things they would need. After fifteen agonizing minutes to Kanda, Lavi was finished. Allen held back a laugh as the man angrily stood up, his proud blue hair up in two long pigtails, both French braided from the top of his head. Kanda growled, his hand out, almost reaching for Lavi's neck.

"Happy? Now where is it?" He hissed, flinging one of the offending pigtails out of his face angrily.

"Remember, all day." Allen commented, ignoring the man's glare and gathering up the things they had borrowed from Linalee.

"I know that!" Kanda snapped back, and Lavi sighed, going to track down Mugan. Kanda was fuming. They were going to pay for this………….Lavi came back, and Kanda snatched his beloved sword out of Lavi's hands, and immediately released it.

"Now Kanda……." Lavi muttered nervously, and with a cry of laughter, tore out of the room. Allen wasn't far behind. Kanda growled, and ran after them, sword raised.

"Kanda?" Kanda froze in the doorway. Komui and all his helpers, and a large group of finders where outside his door. All had the same expression on there face. Some where even doubled up, holding in laughter, knowing if they laughed, they very well might die. The vein was back in Kanda's forehead, throbbing painfully.

"I have a m-mission for y-you, buahahahhahahahahaha!" Komui burst out laughing, holding his sides, and falling to the floor. Kanda growled, and soon it was at Komui's throat. That sobered him up pretty quick.

"Ah, yes, as I was saying, you have a mission. Here are you papers….." Kanda snatched them out of the mans hand and was off down the hall at an incredibly fast pace. Soon, the whole hall was ringing with sounds of hysterical laughter.

"H-hhahah-how did you manage that?" One of the finders managed to gasp out, and Lavi grinned, and Allen gave a light smile.

"Asked him to a game of cards." Lavi started laughing as well, and soon everyone was in tears.

Kanda could hear them down the hall, and he growled, storming out the door and down to the lift. Oh, how they would pay……..

So Kanda plots his revenge, stay tuned for next charpter!


	2. Kanda's 1st revenge

Here comes the second part I do not own Kanda or Lavi, no matter how much I would wish

Here comes the second part I do not own Kanda or Lavi, no matter how much I would wish. Or anything else. Sorry.

"Damn it." Kanda cursed. He had gotten back from his mission, and hurriedly undid his horrid hair style. Only to find that braids make your hair wavy. He was frantically brushing it and trying to get them out. He blew out a frustrated sigh and stepped into a warm bath. He would just have to wash it a day early. Hm. That gave him an idea……..

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! NO-OH!" Lavi came tearing out of the bathroom, towel over his damp head, and screaming, no shirt on, his body glistening in the early morning.

"Ruined! All ruined!" He panicked, not taking the towel off his head. The bookman came around the side, rubbing his temples from the noise.

"What is the problem Lavi?" Lavi turned, comical tears in his eyes. He shook the front of the bookman's coat frantically.

"Panda-sama, its horrible! Ow!" Lavi cried out as the bookman smacked his head, causing it to hit the floor, and knocking off the towel. He stared in what appeared to be wonder, or possibly horror.

"Lavi? I heard your scream, so I came, Oh god." Allen had come around the corner and seen what had happened. His hand went over his mouth, and he held back a giggle. Lavi's hair, was bright pink. Lavi stood up, fists shaking.

"KANDA!!" He roared, and rubbing his head, he took off around the hallway, still half naked.

Upstairs, safe in his room eating, Kanda allowed himself a smile, carefully setting down his chopsticks on his empty bowl. Allen, you're next.


	3. A little mix up

Kanda let himself have a small snicker as he sat plotting in his room

Kanda let himself have a small snicker as he sat plotting in his room. What to do for Allen? Oh yes…………..

"Wha-? AAHH!" Came the fifteen year olds cry from downstairs. Allen stared in horror around his room, searching frantically for his clothes.

"Where, where?" He flipped up his bed covers, looked under them, but still nothing. He lay back on the bed, hands over his face.

"Kanda." He whispered, and risked a slow peak out his door.

"Allen-kun?"

"Lenalee!? What are you doing here?" Allen asked, hiding behind the door, a faint blush staining across his face. Not good.

"I came to walk with you to breakfast!" She smiled, coffee cup in hand. Allen's blush got worse.

"Uh, that's okay…..I really don't feel to good, I think I'll stay inside," He went to shut the door, cursing Kanda. Lenalee stuck her foot in, stopping it from closing.

"Do you have a fever?" She went to put a hand to Allen's head, but the boy backed up, and the door swung open, exposing the boy in his silky blue boxers.

"Oh." Now it was Lenalee's turn to blush, and she looked away with a giggle. Allen, dove under his bed sheets, hurriedly wrapping one around his waist.

"I'm sorry, I'll just go." She left, still giggling, leaving a very bright red exorcist in his room. Allen's head bowed, and he growled. Kanda was now in deep shit. He went to see Komui later that day, along with Jerry, the cook. Kanda had a special surprise coming.

Kanda sat down at in his usual spot at the table, with his usual drink and food. He had heard from a very reliable source that his revenge went very well on Allen. Speaking of which, he here came now, loaded down with food, smirking about something. Kanda shrugged it off, the boy sat at another table. As far as he was concerned, they were even now.

"Oy! Yu!" Kanda winced. The one, the only, (thank god) Lavi. The now pink haired man slid onto the table, uncomfortably close to Kanda's food. Before he could blink, Lavi had grabbed his tea and taken a swig. Kanda grabbed it back angrily. Now he would need some new tea.

"Bakanarou!" Kanda cussed, setting the drink down, his fingers itching towards Mugan.

"Hey, we're even now, right?" Lavi growled, taking the man's chopsticks, while meanwhile, Allen was staring in horror at Lavi. Kanda, momentarily forgetting what had just happened, took a sip of tea to calm himself. Then he stood up, and dumped the rest of it over Lavi's head.

"No, now were even." He stormed off, leaving his food, and a very soaked Lavi. Lavi shook it off and walked over to Allen, poking the shocked boy in the head.

"Oy, what's wrong, Allen-kun?" Allen shook his head, trying to be able to speak.

"Kanda's tea, you drank……..oh god." Allen buried his head in his hands, and Lavi looked worried.

"What?" Allen's hands shook as he stood up.

"I got Jerry to put a potion in it, from Komui…….." He left off miserably, and Lavi fell off the table, staring at Allen from the floor.

"Tell me your kidding." He pleaded, and Allen shook his head. Lavi sighed, and stood up shakily.

"What does it do?" He asked, his voice as steady as he could get it. Allen shook his head.

"Not sure, Komui just grinned and handed me it." Lavi groaned. Great. Just great. He sighed and put his hands in his pocket, heading back to his room. Damn.

Later that night, Lavi went to sleep, and still, nothing had happened. He was starting to think that it was just another failure by Komui, and let it go. He relaxed and went to sleep.

Lavi woke that morning with a stretch. He yawned, and slid out of bed. Wait, this wasn't his room. Had he gotten drunk last night? Probably. He ignored it and stood up, and tasseled his hair. He froze where he stood as his hand went to his hand. His fingers twitched as they explored a good foot of hair, that wasn't his.

"Oh god, please no." With shaking hands, and a horrible feeling in his stomach, Lavi went to a mirror, and saw Kanda's reflection staring back at him, long blue hair down. His hands dug into the wood around the mirror, leaning his head against it in shock. Then he growled.

"ALLEN!" His, or rather Kanda's door flew open, and Lavi looked up to see, himself. He watched as his own body flew across the room and started to strangle him.

"Body thief! What have you done?!" Lavi's body hissed, strangling Kanda's throat, with Lavi inside.

"Kanda, its Lavi!" The new blue haired man managed, and Lavi's body stopped, and then started to strangle him again.

"Baka! Give it back." Lavi's body hissed, and Lavi gasped, managing to shove Kanda off him. Kanda glared at him with one eye from the floor.

"Fix this. Now." Kanda's hands reached for Mugan, which of course was now with Lavi. Oh he was going to kill Lavi for this. Both men sat there, glaring at each other.

Oh, how will this all play out? Dun, dun dun! Thank you all for the reviews, keep them coming! Also, pitch in some ideas if you want Thanks.


	4. Things get a little worse

And here we go, the next part

And here we go, the next part! Muhahahha. Once again, I own nothing, and the next chapter will be what Kanda and Lavi do to each other to get revenge, in their own bodies! It should be fun. Thanks for the reviews again

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While the two men glared at each other, Bookman and Allen were both headed up towards Kanda's room. Both had heard a furious scream of "Allen!" The boy in question was shaking, wondering what exactly Komui's potion had done. They reached Kanda's door, and the furious sound of a struggle could be heard.

"Temearu!" An angry shout followed by a crash.

"Bakanarou!" Bookman sighed, and Allen opened the door, innocence activated. He saw Kanda and Lavi both wrestling on the ground, Lavi on top. Strangely, neither had their innocence out, but Mugan and Lavi's hammer were laying on the floor.

"Stop it!" The bookman growled, and his hand shot out, taking Lavi's body by the ear. Lavi's body, (Kanda) glared at the bookman while his fingers tried to pry the grip off. The bookman raised his foot, and booted who he thought was Lavi into the wall. Kanda groaned. Lavi's body wasn't as in shape as his had been.

Allen's arm shot out and secured Kanda's body, (Lavi,) who, to his immense shock, laughed and stuck out his tongue at Lavi's body along the wall. Allen started. That wasn't like Kanda……Lavi's body groaned again, and Kanda used the wall to get up with Lavi's arms. How embarrassing.

"Teme, you need to take better care of your body." Kanda growled through Lavi's mouth, and Kanda's body gave a huff, and raised a certain finger. Yeah, that one. Lavi's body growled and lurched forward at Kanda's body, only to be stomped on by the bookman.

"Lavi, you baka, stop that."

"I'm not your goddamned apprentice!" Kanda growled, trapped in Lavi's body under the bookman. The panda man raised an eyebrow.

"That's your worst excuse for getting out of work yet." Allen had let Kanda's body down, and Lavi smirked, and started to play with Kanda's blue hair. Lavi's body let out a dangerous growl.

"Look at me, I'm Kanda. All I do all day is play with my sword all day. Like this….." Kanda's body smirked and gave a thrusting motion with its hips, hands tracing over his, well Kanda's front, and Lavi's body, (Kanda) threw off the bookman and lunged at Kanda's own body.

"Temearu!" Lavi's body growled, a killer's aura seeping around the edges. Allen's hand shot out, and snagged an enraged Kanda, (in Lavi's body) Allen gave a howl of pain, as Lavi's teeth had just sunk into his arm. He let go of Lavi's body in a hurry.

He hopped around furiously, holding it and teary eyed. Both he had the bookman looked on in shock, as Lavi's body appeared to weld Mugan. Kanda's body (Lavi) Began to run for dear life as his own body started to chase him, slashing with the sword.

"Baka, its your own body your killing!" That made the real Kanda stop, and his body stick out its tongue. A vein in Lavi's head was close to bursting. He felt a hand on his shoulder, and looked over.

"Well, I don't know how, but I think it's obvious to both Allen and I, that you two have somehow-"ALLEN!!" Both men had forgotten about the white-haired teen, apparently. Kanda's body grabbed his hammer, (It was rather odd to see a Lavi with a glowing sword, and a Kanda with a giant hammer,) and both of them started after the boy.

"AAHHH, NNNNNNOOOOOOO!" Allen cried, and ran out of the room. The murderous intent was back. As Kanda and Lavi fought to get out the door, the bookman snagged both their collars. Kanda's body gasped, and Lavi's fell to the floor. The panda man looked at them both, with almost a smile.

"Do you really want everyone to see that?" Both men glared at each other while shaking their heads. Each had a hand on the other's throat. Bookman sighed and let them go, shutting the door. Allen did not come back. Smart kid. He slid his hands in his pockets with a sigh as the two started to fight again. A vein throbbed.

"Enough! Kanda, that corner, Lavi, that one. If you want to act like kids……" Both men growled and stalked to their corners. Once in his, Lavi, (in Kanda's body) started to make seducing movements with his hips and twirled his hair in the girliest manner he could imagine. Kanda, (in Lavi's body) Snapped, and started to run over, only to have the bookman smack Kanda's body in the head.

"You're not helping Baka!" Kanda's body bent over, holding its sore head.

"Ow, Panda-kun, that one hurt." Bookman's eye twitched as he smacked his idiot apprentice in the head. He turned to both men, one sitting on the floor, the other giving his sore head a rub.

"Now. You both know we're going to have to see Komui about this, so I want no, complaints." He tucked in his sleeves and went to the door with his eyebrow raised.

"Do you think you can both at least act like each other till we get to his lab?" Really, it was like watching two little kids. Both gave stiff nods, and with grimaces, exchanged weapons. Bookman sighed and opened the door, and they headed downstairs.


	5. Slight revenge?

Alright, sorry for the long wait, I've been busy

Alright, sorry for the long wait, I've been busy. Once again, I do not own! Unfortunately. T.T And why this does this twice, I do not understand………. Sorry if its not as good as the others.

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People in the hallways of the black order were scared. With good reason. They watched the bookman coming down the hall, followed by a skipping Kanda. Yes. He was skipping. And the Bookman was restraining a furious Lavi, who, was really Kanda, from strangling his apprentice.

"You are making a scene" The bookman hissed, his arm locked around Lavi's body's neck, so Kanda didn't wind up killing his own body. Lavi's teeth sank into the bookman's arm and he growled, collaring the red head.

"Do you really want to be stuck like this forever?" That made Lavi's body, (Kanda) Stop. He shoved his hands in his pockets and sulked down the rest of the hallway, while Kanda's hips swayed outrageously down the hall. He let out a low growl, trying to reach for Mugen, who was on Kanda's hips.

"If it meant some peace, I might consider it……" Lavi's body left off, and with a smirk, he reached into Lavi's pocket, hand wrapping around the precious hammer. His fingers tried to crush the offending object. But to no avail. The bookman growled and tugged on Kanda's ponytail, pulling him back and making the man give a cry of pain.

"Lavi, stop this, or you will regret it." He muttered, and Kanda's body shrugged. Oh well. They finally got to the lab, and Komui stepped out, coffee mug in hand.

"Yes? Can I help you?" Two minutes later, Lavi's body's hands were wrapped around Komui's throat.

"What?!" Kanda, (in Lavi's body) hissed. Komui ducked out of his grip, and scurried behind a new robot he was working on.

"I need a day to do it. That simple." He held out his hand with a sigh, and Lavi's body stormed out of the room.

"I. Do. Not. Believe. This." He growled, and then grinned. Oh, if he had Lavi's body for a day, well, it did need some fine tuning…….and with a smirk, he headed down towards the training room.

…………………………………………………

Lavi, (In Kanda's body,) however, was content to lay around in the lab, watching Komui work. He looked up as Lenalee came in.

"Hello Kanda." Kanda's body stared, and then let out a smirk. He stood up, hand out. Lenalee took it with a confused expression, which turned to a blush as he kissed it.

"Kanda-kun?" She stuttered, and Kanda's body looked up with a grin.

"Would you come with me on a date, Lenalee? My room at nine." Lenalee's blush deepened and she nodded.

"O-Oh my." She blushed again happily, and ran out with her hands over her face. Kanda's body sat back with a smirk. His work was done for the day, and now Lenalee wouldn't leave Kanda alone, or she would make his life hell. Haha.

CRACK! Kanda's body sat back, holding his head, and groaning. He sunk to the floor, glaring with watery eyes up at Komui.

"Ow, what was that for?" Komui stood over him with a clipboard, and raised it to strike again, but Kanda's body moved out of the way.

"How dare you play with Lenalee's feelings? Komurin!" The robot in question poked its head up, red eye glowing.

"Oh shit." Kanda's body's eyes widened, and he took off with a sprint, with the robot close behind.

"Crap, Crap, Crap, shitty Crap!" Kanda's body hollered as it took off with Komurin close behind. The feeling in his legs was actually good, not tired like his could get. Kanda's body grinned.

"At least Yu-chan is in shape." He muttered, running down the hall.

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In the weight room, Lavi's shirtless body was drenched in sweat. Every muscle in Lavi's body burned. A full day of training, and it now hurt to move. Lavi's body let out a smirk, and headed, with a wince, towards another weight machine. A few hours of mental pain was nothing to Kanda. (In Lavi's body anyway.) Even if it would help the man in long run. Oh well. Lavi's body sank into a chair with weights on either side. Lavi's hand brushed a drenched red bang out of one eye.

"Why he doesn't tie this up or get it cut….." He wondered, reaching painfully for another weight. He completed about ten reps before Lavi's body finally gave out. His body sat back with a satisfied sigh, and checked the clock. It was time. With difficultly, he managed to get dressed and go back to the lab.

………………………………………………………………………..

Komui sat back happily, watching Kanda's body being drug in by Komurin by the ponytail.

"Ow! That hurts you know." Kanda' body muttered, finally being able to stand up, and rubbing at his sore head. Kanda's body was covered in several bruises, and looked a little worse for the wear. Lavi came in next, looking sweaty, and smelling like it too. Kanda's eyes widened as he watched Lavi's body limp in.

"What did you do to me, Yu-Chan?" Lavi's body smirked and sank into a chair.

"You'll find out. My body doesn't look so good either…….." He growled, staring at it. They both turned to Komui, and saw the bookman was there as well.

"Is it ready?" Komui nodded, and held up a vial. Lavi's body practically sprinted over and grabbed it, and almost feel over from overwork. It gave a grunt of pain, before drinking half the vial. Kanda's body stood up, and held out his hand, and drank the rest. Everyone waited, and suddenly, nothing happening. Lavi's hands found Komui's throat again.

"Why isn't it working?" He hissed, partially, okay mostly, from pain. Komui ducked out of the grip, massaging his sore neck.

"Go to sleep, and I'm sure it'll happen." With a growl, Lavi's body lay back in the chair, and his eyes closed. Kanda's body gave a shrug and did the same, across the room. Komui sat down at his desk, patting Komurin on the head.

"Now we wait till morning." The bookman nodded, pitying Allen, wherever he was. Both men would be out for blood in the morning, if it did work. Well, if it didn't, they would still be out for blood, only this time it would be Komui's.

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Thanks guys, for all the reviews, this is a fun one to write I'll try to get the next chapter up faster.


	6. Poor Allen, and Lenalee

Thanks guys, for all the reviews, this is a fun one to write I'll try to get the next chapter up faster

Thanks guys, for all the reviews, this is a fun one to write I'll try to get the next chapter up faster. Or try to. I'm so busy.

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Kanda's eyes snapped open in the dark. Hm? His head hurt a little, but everything else…Wait! Kanda sat up, in the opposite chair in Komui's lab. He looked over, and sure enough, Lavi was in the chair to the side, snoring. Kanda let out a sigh of relief, and sat up, looking around. Great. He closed his eyes. He was still tired. His hand ran up to feel his own long hair, and he almost smiled. His hand slid down, and he stopped. His hand rested on Mugen, and it brought back memories of whose fault this was. Allen. His eyes narrowed, and he stood. It was time to leave. He strode across the room, only to be stopped by a semi loud roar. He glared down at his stomach.

"Maybe breakfast first……." He muttered, and opened the door, heading down towards the cafeteria. He got some odd looks in the hall, but that was to be expected he supposed. A vein throbbed in his forehead, and his hand twitched towards Mugen every time someone looked his way. When he got to the cafeteria, it was almost empty. It was later than he had thought. He sighed and grabbed his normal breakfast, and was on his way to sit down, when he was stopped by Lenalee.

"Good morning Kanda-Kun!" She piped happily, and Kanda growled a reply. What was she doing? Her green pigtails swayed as she followed him to the table, and sat down. He turned to her angrily.

"What do you want woman?" He hissed, and she looked taken aback. Kanda ignored her and took a bite of his soba, chewing slowly.

"I just wanted to know, if, well, if we were still on for tonight?" Kanda choked on his food, the noodles sticking in his throat. He thrust his hand into his gut, and coughed violently, trying to clear his throat. He sputtered, getting soba on his shirt front. He finally got everything out, and sputtered,

"What?!" He gaped at her, his mind quickly putting together what must have happened, anger replacing his sore throat. His eyes narrowed as he gave another cough, angrily scraping the noodles off his shirt with a napkin, promptly tearing it. Lenalee blushed, looking down at her shoes.

"Well, you're the one who asked…." She almost giggled, and Kanda stood up, glaring at her.

"I did no such thing, Baka woman." He growled, and most of the few people in the cafeteria watched. Lenalee took a breath, her blush fading.

"Then what was, yesterday, with, the kiss and-"KISS?" Kanda roared, his hands driving into the table. He was aware that people were staring. Lavi and Allen were more then dead. Lenalee looked up, her eyes watery. Kanda growled. He couldn't tell the group he had switched bodies……so. He placed a hand on the bridge of his nose, more than pissed off.

"Don't get your fantasies mixed up with reality, stupid girl." He hissed, shoving his tray away from him, and starting off back towards the lab.

"Kanda….." Lenalee softly asked, tears overflowing out of her eyes. He turned back irritably.

"What now?" He yelled, turning to face her, not looking happy. Her hand raised, and before he could comprehend what was happening, she laid a perfect backhand across his face. Normally, he would have been able to dodge or something, but he wasn't really ready, and he took a misstep, throwing him off balance and his leg caught around the table. He stumbled over it, hands managing to grasp the edge, but his weight pulled him down, and his back slammed into the floor. He barely stopped his head from cracking against the tile. He sat up fuming, his anger past boiling point.

"What was that for-"YOU ASSHOLE!" Lenalee screamed and ran from the room. The right side of Kanda's face burned, and he got up slowly, seething. All the finders in the area rushed for cover, not wanting to get caught up in that. His aura glowed purple, lashing out at anyone left in the room. He growled, and stormed off towards the lab, a large red handprint very obvious on his face. Oh, some body was going to die. No, make that two somebody's.

--

Lavi's eyes cracked open, and he looked around slowly.

"Kanda? Oh!" He looked down to see his own body, and smiled. He was Lavi again. He went to stand up, and then cried out as pain waves flashed across his body. As he had pulled his arms up, his body flared up with pain again. He lay back in the seat, not moving, breathing hard and trying not to scream.

"The hell?" He growled, lifting his arm again, pain searing over his body. Someone was a slow learner. He dropped it with a grimace. His eyes hardened, and with a quick breath, he forced himself to stand. Like I said……….

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" He fell to the floor, his eyes watery from pain. His whole body ached. Like it was on fire, all his muscles burned. He lay sprawled on the floor, his quick mind having the solution in about a half a second.

"Kanda, what did you do, you asswipe?" He moaned, sliding up into a sitting position with a horrible wince of pain. The bookman, who had seen this all, smirked as he stood over Lavi.

"Looks someone finally got you to work out, eh?" Lavi growled at the panda man above him.

"Shut up panda." A vein throbbed in the bookman's head, and he reached over and punched Lavi in the head. The red haired man doubled over, holding his head and making a face as it pulled other muscles, his breathing fast and hard.

"OUCH! Baka." Lavi hissed. The bookman rolled his eyes and held out two pills, and a glass of water to Lavi. Lavi had them down in two seconds.

"Give them fifteen minutes to start working." Lavi painfully nodded, resting on the floor. Oh, Kanda was going to get it! He just didn't know how yet. He lay there plotting for a good ten minutes, he and the bookman looked up as a scream resounded through the halls.

"NO-NO-NO-NO-NO, KANDA!" It could only be Allen. Lavi, who was feeling better, stood, running a hand through his hair.

"Let us have a moment of silence for our dear Allen-kun." The screams echoed down the hallway, and sounded like they were getting closer. The door flew open, and Kanda stood in the doorway, with a panicky looking Allen. Allen had been drug down by his ear, (it was in a firm hold by Kanda,) and Mugen at his throat.

"Come here you little rat." Kanda snarled, pulling Allen in closer, threatening to cut off his head if he even summoned his innocence.

"I'm sorry Kanda." Allen pleaded, trying to wrap his other arm around Kandas, before his ear was wrenched off completely.

"Oh you will be, trust me." Kanda hissed, dragging Allen past Lavi, who looked bewildered. Kanda released his sword, and grabbed a vile off Komui's table. (Who was no where to be seen, of course.) With a toss, he spilled the contents all over Allen. Allen jumped back, stunned, but it was too late. He doubled over in pain, and Kanda watched happily.

Allen let out a painful groan, holding at his chest, and what looked like……….his crotch. He fell to the floor, panting. Kanda's eyes watched very interested. Allen felt like his body was on fire. His chest felt like it was going to split in two, and his lower stomach area felt like it was being torn apart from the inside.

"WAAAAHHHHHHH!" He cried out, and he panicked. He felt his hands both clutch over his stomach, and then he closed his eyes, the weird sensations continuing. Suddenly, the pain stopped, and he looked up, unclenching his hands. Eh? His bangs were in his eyes. But he didn't have bangs…..He stood up slowly, feeling odd, and rather heavier than he used to. He stood up, and realized…….he bounced.

"EEEEHHHH?" He panicked again, looking down. There, on his chest, were a lovely set of C cup breasts.

"No…….." He let out, his voice defiantly higher. Kanda let out a smirk. Lavi stood, staring. Before him where Allen had been, was a lovely white haired woman, with curvy hips, a full bust, and well, Allen. As a girl. Lavi's heart beat fast.

"WOO! Strike!" He teased, going over and smiling at Allen.

"That's quite a rack you have there." He motioned, poking the left boob in question. Allen squealed, pulling back.

"Lavi!" He clutched at his chest, then made a face, and let go. Suddenly, an odd sound resounded around the room. Both Lavi and Allen turned, looking at Kanda. The man was actually laughing.

"Kanda?" Kanda waved off the comment, laughing to himself, hand over his mouth, and near tears in his eyes.

"Have fun, Moyashi." He laughed himself out of the room, and Lavi turned to Allen with a grin.

"You make a wonderful girl, Allen-Chan!" He smiled, turning to find the bookman holding a pile of clothes.

"These might be better for you, I think. This is most interesting." The bookman put the clothes in Allen's stunned and speechless hands as the bookman inspected him.

"Please don't do that……." He sighed, slipping his shirt off so he could change. Lavi turned a lovely pink color, and had a nosebleed right there. He fell to the floor, holding his nose, and shaking.

"A-Allen, you baka! You're a girl now." He muttered, keeping his eyes down from the unexpected flash. Allen's eye widened and he quickly put his shirt back down.

"Your right, sorry." He mumbled, going to a corner to change. Lavi didn't move off the floor, his heart pounding, sending more blood out through his nose, the bookman sighed.

"Baka Lavi…" Lavi stood up, glaring at the old man.

"Hey, it wasn't like it was on-you old rat!" Lavi pointed, because, sure enough, a small trickle of blood was coming out the bookman's nose. Lavi, whose hand was drenched in blood now, laughed.

"So he, I mean she, got you to, huh Gisan?" He laughed, wiping off most of the blood. This was going to be fun, he could tell. Well, maybe not for Allen………

………………………………………………………….

So there we go! Thanks, and I'm sorry it took a while. Got a lot going on you know? So yes, read, review, and love it!


	7. Lavi gets itpart 1

Thanks guys, for all the reviews, I took longer to make this one special That's a lie, I just didn't have time, I was gone all week, and gasp had no computer accesses!!

Once again, I own nothing otherwise…….you would never see Kanda or Lavi…3

…………………………………………………………………

Over the course of the next week, several interesting things were going on in the black order. First, and foremost, was the trouble of Allen being a girl. Komui was stumped, and the bookman could not seem to leave Allen alone. Neither, it seemed, could Lavi, Lenalee, or anyone else.

Allen was once again walking down the hallway, towards Lenalee's room. He just couldn't get used to the feeling of bouncing down the hallway. He had to walk slow, hating the jiggling feeling. Lenalee, (Being the flat lesbo that she is, sorry, don't like her after ep. 60,) Didn't have a big enough bra for him. So he had to suffer through shopping with her, and her tag along, Lavi. That had been fun.

FLASH BACK!

"Uh, Lenalee? How does this go again?" A confused Allen asked from the inside of a dressing room. He was staring at a white bra, top off, and rather puzzled. He had one arm in the strap, and the cups were actually on his head. His reflection did not look pleased.

"I'll show you!" Lavi piped from outside, his hand going to the door handle with a grin on his face. Lenalee scowled.

SMACK! Lavi doubled over with a groan, holding the back of his head, and crouching on the floor in pain.

"Ow…..only kidding……" He sheepishly tried as Lenalee stormed past him to help poor Allen while a rejected Lavi rubbed his sore head.

END! Muahahahahhaha-eh. Shrugs

Anyway, he reached Lenalee's door, knocked and stepped in. He'd been going to see her to get clothes, (They were always a little tight, and Lavi was quick to point this out when he wasn't drooling over Allen's new curves,) and also to have his hair done. The only way for him to manage it was to be pulled back, and braided. Lenalee answered with her usually happiness, and pulled a brush through Allen's hair. Such had become his morning routine.

The other thing that was going on, was that the bookman had had a wonderful idea. Lavi, however, wasn't so keen on it. Ever since he had seen the results of Kanda's workout, Lavi now went to train with the swordsman once every day. Lavi was getting in shape yes, but he hated it. He was always trying to get out of it, or hiding. The bookman was pissed, and Kanda only doubled his workout, but he never stopped trying. Today was another one of his hiding days.

"Lavi! Your late, get out here." Kanda growled, storming around the black order. He actually looked forward to this, it was a time for him to get back at Lavi, and plus, well, it was honestly just fun to see him suffer.

The Lavi in question was hiding, in the ceiling. Yes, in the ceiling. Kanda seemed to have found all his other spots, and the bookman was happy to help point them out.

FLASH BACK AGAIN!

"Lavi, come here." Lavi looked up from his book, still a little sore from Kanda's workout, (In his body,) but actually not feeling bad about the whole thing in general, oddly enough.

"Yes, bookman?" He asked, paling a little when he saw Kanda was next to his master. He closed the book, setting it on the chair and crossing his arms, giving the bookman his full attention, while peering eerily at Kanda.

"I have something for you to do for your training." Lavi's eye shifted over to look nervously at Kanda, and then back to the panda looking man.

"And that would be…….?" He left off, standing up, not liking the look in Kanda's eye, the smile on the swordsman's face, or the fact that Kanda's hand was itching towards Mugen. Those were all bad signs; he didn't need to be a bookman to know that.

"Kanda's going to be your personal trainer." Lavi's mouth opened, and then it closed, and opened again. This was pretty inconceivable to out poor Lavi. He finally stood up, and pointed a finger, face drained of color.

"No! Do you have any idea of what he would do to me?" Lavi stuttered, moving behind the chair as he saw Kanda start forward. The bookman's eyebrow raised, and gave Lavi one of those, 'you're an idiot' looks.

"Get you in shape?" The panda man asked, shaking his head at Lavi, and Kanda's grin grew as he approached a cowering Lavi behind the chair.

"And to think you're my successor." He sighed and looked directly at Lavi, his eyes boring into his, telling Lavi there would be no arguing. At all. Lavi squirmed from behind his chair, trying to avoid that gaze. He knew he was screwed. If bookman said it, he pretty much had to do it. One of the many downsides to having a master.

"You're to see him once a day, every day, for training. No excuses." Lavi had sunk back onto the floor, thinking hard. This was not good……….

END FLASHBACK

Lavi watched silently through a grate in the ceiling as Kanda prowled around below him. As long as he could hide, he wouldn't have to go. Not that Kanda really did anything besides give him a workout, and honestly, it wasn't too bad, but Lavi was just one of those people that liked to make life difficult. It was just what he did, and plus, it was fun to make Yu mad.

Kanda's temper was rising. Why did that idiot always do this? Mugen's hilt slid in and out of his fingers, begging to be plunged into something. Kanda's eyes lit up and he had an idea. Innocence reacted whenever it got close to another.

"Innocence!" He cried, pulling Mugen out with a flourish. Lavi paled in the ceiling, his hands going to cover up his hammer. Kanda wasn't close enough yet, but Lavi knew what he was up to. This was bad.

Kanda walked slowly down the hallway, sword up. Lavi's eyes widened as he got closer and closer. Lavi cussed under his breath. He didn't have a lot of room to move, and he was in an odd position as it was. He crouched down low, and slowly crawled along the ceiling vents. Now the downside was, he couldn't see where Yu was, but that would be okay. It branched up here in about a minute. He felt his innocence start to grow against his leg. He felt the handle stick in the vent as it continued to grow into a fighting size, and now he was stuck. He panicked, trying to unwedge it, with a heartfelt, but quiet, "Shit!"

Kanda kept going, not sure how long it would take him to find Lavi. This place was huge, but it usually set them back a couple hours, at least. He walked slowly down the hall, senses on high alert. Being a swordsman, he had better reflexes than most. His senses were well trained, and he was watching and listening. His head snapped up as he heard something that sounded like 'Shit!' From the ceiling. He smirked.

Lavi was still struggling with his hammer. He couldn't risk saying 'Shrink, Shrink,' or whatever, because Yu might hear. He was trying now, to undo the belt that held his hammer, so he could leave it and go on. He yelped however, as a sword blade came sliding through the ceiling. His face paled as the blade slowly extended. Lavi couldn't move, (thanks to his innocence) and he watched horrified as the blade went up towards his neck. In the vents there wasn't a lot of room to move anyway, and it was all he could do to turn his head to one side. He shivered as he felt the cool metal slide and bite into his neck. He held back a hiss of pain as it tore a thin crimson line down the side of his throat, and up the right side of his face. It stopped as it hooked in his headband.

Kanda's smile was one of pure evil as he slid the blade slowly into the ceiling. If he heard more cuss words, or movement, he had found Lavi. If not, he would just slide his blade down the ceiling vent, destroying it and taking Lavi with it. He listened, but didn't hear Lavi's faint hiss of pain. With some effort, he gave the blade a quick twist, turning it so he could run it down the ceiling.

Lavi couldn't stop a cry as the blade cut into his skin as it turned, splashing red onto the dark walls. He slid a hand up to his face, trying to stop the bleeding. Something slid into his eyes, and he realized that Kanda had cut through his headband. He sighed, pulling it down and pressing it against his face, in an attempt to stop the blood. He watched as the sword blade pulled quickly down, and he saw Yu through a hole in the ceiling. He waved cheekily.

"I'm rather stuck, you see………" He grinned. Now that Kanda could see him…….

"Grow, grow, grow!" He yelled at his hammer, and the handle tore through the belt, and Lavi seized it as the hammer broke through the vent, and he swung down at Yu, heaving the large hammer at his foe. Kanda smirked and ducked under, his blade sliding under Lavi's Adam's apple.

Lavi swallowed hard against the blade, the action drawling blood from his throat yet again.

"I suggest you come with me." Kanda's voice hissed out, and Lavi didn't dare move. By the look in Kanda's eyes, he had pushed him past a certain safe point. Which, was never good. Lavi didn't dare nod, but was forcibly marched down the hallway at knife point. Backwards. Which, if you haven't done it before, is rather hard. He didn't dare trip over anything, or he would lose his head. And Kanda was still the faster runner.

Kanda's pale eyes locked into Lavi's green ones, daring him to move off the blade. Lavi might have been an idiot, but he wasn't that stupid.

I'M SO SORRY!! I WANTED THIS TO BE LONGER, BUT YOU GUYS WAITED SO LONG, SO HERE'S SOMETHING TO READ!! I'll get the next part up sooner, k?


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